Z IS FOR ZEE ME or ZOOM OUT (pick your poison)

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Everyone thought X was a tough letter. I am here to tell you that Z was the one that kicked my butt. So, as a last ditch effort, I looked through MY OLD POSTS to see if I had anything that started with the letter Z. Nope.

So, I am going to share with you something that I wrote that doesn't start with Z. I want to give you a chance to Zee Me as I used to be. I read this old post and thought to myself, "Oh my gosh. I don't recognize that girl. She was seriously messed up."

And I am so happy. Happy that I am not in that place any longer. Ironically, this post is about cycles. Seasons. How things always change. It is deceiving because things stay the same so long, or we grow out of one place and into another slowly.  So we don't realize how far we've come until we read something like this and think, "Holy tamole, I can't believe I wrote that. I remember my life being like that, but now it is better. I am better. Thank God."

For the record, less than 10 people were reading this blog when I posted this. I think I had 8 followers. (I believe I can see why;) So, Z is also for Zoom Out. It takes perspective that sometimes only time provides to see things as they really are. Or to pull yourself together. Whatever.


Cue the traveling music:





I wrote this back on March 4, 2010.  Buckle your seat belts.

A TIME FOR EVERYTHING

Do you ever have those days when you really don't want to get out of bed? Well, I spent my first thirty minutes desperately having to pee but not wanting to move. It was a quandary. On my list of Things I Needed To Do was call my doctor's office and try to explain how I missed my appointment without sounding like a crazy person, which I think I am, but I am not sure I really want them to know. It made me cranky. And then I had a revelation about why old people are probably angry and bitter. People assume it's because they're old. Not so. Maybe it's because they forget stuff and then find appointment cards and realize they've forgotten stuff. I know it made me mad... at me. And that is lousy. It's always much better to blame someone else. Self-directed anger makes a person really pissy. Throw in a nursing home stay and I can see lots of anger issues. I started thinking about that instead of what I was going to say to my doctor's receptionist because I was still trying to divert my attention from my bladder. Finally the bladder won out and I got up.

Turns out the doctor's receptionist was totally cool about rescheduling my appointment for next week and that turned out A-okay. The other biggie on my plate for today was trying to get a copy of my vehicle title from Florida. This is a critical document that I should have. The crazy thing is that I lost it in storage when I moved from Georgia to Florida and had to go to the Georgia DMV and pay to get a copy sent to Florida. A person with their head screwed on straight would have filed it and not be going through this nightmare again. So, I am trying to order a copy online and have this resolved before my birthday at the end of this month. I have been fighting with the Florida website for a while now and getting nowhere. I tried using my stepdad's desktop today, instead of my laptop, and it did seem to go better, but it didn't recognize my VIN number. I am not sure how a mentally healthy person would have coped. I am fairly certain it wouldn't have been a crying jag followed by lying down on the floor with the dog. That was what I did. That doesn't sound so bad, except I was having a lot of negative thoughts during the crying jag. Bad bad bad.

People keep telling me that if you think you're crazy or you can identify the crazy, then you're really not crazy. It's when that line completely blurs for you that you actually are crazy. So, the truth is I know that I'm in trouble. Actually, I knew that when I woke up. I was dreaming about glazed donuts and rice krispy treats. Whenever I crave sweets that means I am STRESSED OUT and I am not a sweets eater. It's also a symptom of the chronic fatigue. So, I knew I had to do something healthy because my train was going nowhere good. I decided I could take one of the dogs for a walk. It was good for the dog. It was good for me. Sunshine is good. I could see no downside.


What caught my attention today were the trees. They aren't very pretty right now. They are all naked and exposed and barren looking. Winter strips of them their leaves, their adornment, their garnish, and they have to stand there and take it until spring. If a tree had feelings, I would imagine it would dislike winter the most, not for being cold, but for being so callous in denuding the tree of its glory. Of course, the tree has the advantage of understanding cycles and what some would call "the balance". Insomuch as it might loathe winter, its enormous love for spring wouldn't be as appreciated, if not for winter. That's what winter does for spring.; it creates a vacuum for spring to fill. Therefore, the tree doesn't resist winter. It accepts the seasons as they come and go.

I am like the tree in winter. I am naked and exposed and totally off my game. The difference is I am not accepting it. I am banging against it. A friend sent me this in an email and I couldn't wrap my brain around it in a productive way. I understood the theory, but it only WORKS when you USE it. She said this, "Here's the thing about the law of attraction that many people don't get: WE GET WHAT WE GIVE IN LIFE. When we want more of something, we have to give it to create a vacuum for more of it to flow toward us. Your reality seems to be a pretty closed system; send some energy OUT - give other people what you hope to receive physically, mentally, emotionally - and blessings will flow back to you." Let me put this another way, I knew that what she was saying was that I was going to have to leave my house and spend time with my friends. That sounds easy enough in theory.

The reality is that I am living on a schedule of popping pain pills every six hours, keeping up with it on my little calendar, feel like crap, and am really close to unhinged all of the time. I don't want my friends to SEE THAT. That is not sending good energy out, that is releasing a scary person that they haven't ever met into their universe. I don't ever want them to meet Scary Me. Scary Me is that denuded tree and it is ugly. Scary Me hasn't found "the balance" and doesn't know when spring is coming. Scary Me gets reprieves sometimes during the day and is able to make insightful comments on other people's blogs. Basically, I think that I have just said that the only people I can send good energy to are people I am not talking to face to face. Egads. In other words, I know what my friend is telling me. I get it. I understand it. I can see that for my life to be better I need to start doing those things. I have to be like the tree and create a vacuum if I ever want to see spring. Okay. Since I want to be lovely again, I will try.


A Time for Everything
Ecclesiastes 3
3:1 For everything there is a season,
and a time for every matter under heaven:
2 a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
3 a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.


After I read this, I realized that I am lovely again. Or much closer to lovely. I have walked a long road and didn't even appreciate how hard and far it was until this moment. So, zoom out everyone and look back at where you've been so that you can appreciate how far you've come! 

All I want is you to see me

Here I am
I'm new as morning
Here I am
Just like a sun
Here I am
Without one and I'm the one for you

Here I am
You still know me
Here I am
Take another look
Here I am
Same old story in a brand new book

~Train 

Y IS FOR YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

A Yellow Rose of Texas is none other than my good friend, Jasmine. She is one of the few bloggers that I have met in person. And she is delightful. I mean seriously wonderful. What my dad would have called "good people." She is just as real, honest, and forthright in person as on her blog. Okay, more so. I am one of her biggest fans. Now, I bet you think she lives in Texas. Nope. But she is trying to get there. She says this on her blog, "Sorting through an emotional journey to reach a physical place that more precisely represents that which resides in my soul... I have come to realize that we are not always born in our 'home' and that my uniquely conservative, yet non-traditional viewpoint is best suited in a place called Texas. "I'm going where the sun keeps shinin' through the pourin' rain, going where the weather suits my clothes, bankin' off of the northeast winds, sailin' on summer breeze, and skippin' over the ocean like a stone..."-Harry Nilsson, from Midnight Cowboy"

Cue the traveling music:



Echoes by Jasmine
11/6/13

It echoes in my kitchen.  I have gotten rid of so much, that the place literally echoes.  I noticed it the other day.  It made me think about when we first moved into this house, almost 12 years ago.

I needed this home so much back then.  I needed something, anything that really was a home.

We had moved here from a tiny little cinder block rental house and this house was so huge compared to what we had moved from that it echoed in every room.

The house wasn't the only thing that felt empty.  My heart was empty.

I had just 'lost' my mother to her mental illness.  My sister had just had a baby, that I instantly fell madly in love with, and she had taken him 4 and 1/2 hours away to live with a man that she wasn't legally supposed to be seeing at all.

I so desperately needed something solid, something with a real foundation that I could build upon.  That's what this house has been for me.

This house has been the place where my husband and I have both grown into ourselves.  We have loved our friends and family so freely here.  We have shared this home for more time than either of us have ever come close to being in any other home, in either of our lives.

Now, over the last couple of years, we have been preparing to leave in search of new and different adventures.  We are both more sure than ever that it's time to go, to seek out the sun, to find yet another facet of ourselves that we haven't met yet.

And so I have been slowly, but surely, emptying out this house.  I have known for a while now that I intend to leave without much baggage.  We will leave this place in a very similar state to what it was when we came here.  There will be echoes in the empty rooms and my heart will be open and ready for the next big thing.

It isn't easy to make a change, but it can be the best thing we do for ourselves. I hope you join Jasmine in her journey. It is exciting to reach out and embrace life and she certainly is doing that!

X IS FOR X-Y-Z: THE MECHANIX OF AMERYCAN POLTICZ

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

X-Y-Z: THE MECHANIX OF AMERYCAN POLITICZ was written by Stephen T. McCarthy over at FERRET-FACED FASCIST FRIENDS.  However, I could have used his URL for my "X" today: xtremelyun-pcandunrepentant.  You might wonder why someone would change their blog to F-FFF from that (I did). He says this in his FAQ:  "I think very few readers stumbling upon this Blog and seeing the self-applied "fascist" label would take it seriously. I think most people would immediately suspect, at the very least, that there’s more to the title than meets the eye."

Doing his best James Dean

It took me several months weeks to really understand what Stephen was TALKING ABOUT on his blog. Okay, it was probably months. *******Shhhh. Don't tell.******* Here's the thing about politics.... we all have IDEAS of how we think the government operates. And then there is the truth of the how the government actually operates. We have this IDEA that if you call yourself a Republican that means you stand for (insert your thoughts here) and that if you are Democrat you stand for (insert your thoughts here). Here comes the bad news folks.... YOU might hold to those beliefs but our representatives in government... they do not.

Therefore, Stephen dislikes politicians of all stripes (with a few exceptions). You only make his A-List if you are actively protecting our rights as stated in The Constitution. And he points out, regularly, that pretty much NO ONE in Washington is doing that. Trust me, I know that it is difficult to accept the idea that the political arena doesn't work as you thought.

Does that make a person uncomfortable? You bet.

Does that make his blog controversial? You bet.

Arlee Bird said this about Stephen's blog...

And that is true.

So, slip on your Thinking Cap because we are about to dive in. And keep this thought in mind: “No one party can fool all of the people all of the time. That’s why we have two parties.” 
~ Bob Hope

 

Cue the traveling music:



X-Y-Z: THE MECHANIX OF AMERYCAN POLITICZ (excerpted) by Stephen T. McCarthy
6/10/10

X-Y-Z (Or, “THE HEGELIAN DIALECTIC”)

The Hegelian Dialectic used in the realm of politics is a form of conflict resolution in which a condition (“Thesis” a.k.a. “Z”) is challenged or endangered by an opposing force (“Antithesis” a.k.a. “X”) and culminates in a resolution or compromise (“Synthesis” a.k.a. “Y”).

Today, we have an ideal example of The Hegelian Dialectic which we can look at in the form of ObamaCare. It is agreed upon at a certain level by our Social/Political Engineers behind the scenes that Socialized Medicine is the goal for a variety of reasons. But getting there can’t be accomplished in one big leap due to some citizen opposition. When a condition must be brought about in stages, the Elites, who manipulate our landscape for their own benefit, will utilize the Hegelian model.

The Republicans, pretending to fight for The Individual and professing a wish to retain the status quo, have set up at position “Z”. The Democrats, pretending to fight for The People and professing the need for an entirely reorganized and outright Socialized medical system, have set up at position “X”.

(Left) X ----------------------------------- Z (Right)
Everyone knows that a significant segment of the American People is still a bit squeamish about overt Socialism, so the move to “X” will have to be accomplished by degrees.

What will ultimately occur with the ObamaCare proposition is a compromise. The medical/insurance system we presently have will indeed be altered, but not to the degree that the Democrats are calling for. The Republicans will give some ground while engaged in “the good fight” and the Democrats will reluctantly accept a position to the right of their desired “X”. When the pseudo-fighting is all over, when the dust has settled and the smoke has cleared, you will find that we will have been moved left of “status quo Z” and met the Democrats at Y. The compromise at Y will be a semi-socialized system. This fake fight will eventually lead to this:

X compromises to the Y position as does Z. (If you want to see the cool graph link back to the original post. Blogger has foiled my every attempt to recreate it. Same goes with the one below.)

Afterwards, the Republicans will be able to say, "We defended America against the Liberals and managed to avoid X." The Democrats will be able to say, "We fought against the Right-Wing Extremists and we managed to get Y for The People."

But the next time this issue is brought to the table, the Democrats will set up at “W” and the Republicans will be defending the NEW status quo at “Y”.

(Left) W ---------------------------------- Y (Right)
After the phony fight is over and the two parties have made their compromises toward the “center”, the healthcare issue will stand at “X” which, of course, is where the socialistic Democrats had intended to take us all along and the point that the Republicans knew they would eventually reach during the process of “yielding a reluctant consent” (to again borrow a phrase from Edward Mandell House).

W compromises to the  X position as does Y.

Make no mistake about it, both political parties knew all along that our destination would be “X” because it was determined by the Council on Foreign Relations which guides (read: “directs”) both the Democrats and the Republicans.

This formula is played out over and over again in both the Big Colosseum (at the National level) and in the smaller arenas (in the state legislatures). And this, ladies and gentlemen, is one of the most ingenious tactics by which our elected representatives have been able, over time, to move this country ever Leftward into Socialism and Big Brother Statism.


I know that is a lot to chew on. Keep in mind that was written back in 2010 and look at where we are now :Y. In fact, your brain might even now be rebelling that this could possibly true. *It just isn't possible that the Democrats and Republicans are in it together to strip away our Constitutional rights and move us toward Socialism.* I know that it is tough to swallow. It means accepting that NO ONE in Washington is actually on the side of We The People and they are all working together to take away our liberty. OR maybe you are excited to read something by someone who isn't rooting for the Red or Blue team, but is on YOUR side. 

W IS FOR WANNA BUY A DUCK

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Wanna Buy A Duck, penned by the incredible Manzanita, is always one of my favorite reads.  Even though she rarely talks about it on her blog, Manzi has done more Living than most of us will ever experience. I get *the best* comments from her.. She tends to not talk about all of the events that turned her into the woman she is today. Experience shapes our lives and thinking, no? Well, Manzi owns experience. Just some interesting tidbits she has shared here in my comments: There was a time she paid her bills by gambling in the casinos because money was tight. She was married to a man who owned a baseball team. Fidel Castro wanted to be a pitcher playing pro ball. He tried out for the team, but her husband said "no." He returned to Cuba and the rest is history. The only time she has ever seen a doctor was for the birth of her children, because her husband wanted that. She is also one of the healthiest people I've ever "met." Wonder if those two things are related???? Enough yakking by me...

Cue the traveling music:




I should listen by Manzanita
2/19/13

Costco Shoppers in a Row. Pick your partner and Dosey Doe

For a child of the Great Depression, Costco is my kind of store. We, of that era, have to keep a well-stocked pantry. For others living in Montana, they stock up because who knows when they may visit a store again, especially in the winter.
I kept running into these two old cowboys and my mind likes to make up stories about strangers. I imagined them living on a ranch in White Sulphur Springs and could see them putting away their groceries.
I was mainly in Costco to purchase a salad spinner that I was drawn to the week before.
At that time, I stood in front of a salad spinners display and fought an urge  to buy a spinner. A silly thought, I have a spinner . That evening as I was spinning greens, my spinner cracked and spewed out  pieces of plastic. Finish salad spinner. Dang, why didn't I buy that one. Things like that frequently happen to me.

I got in the check-out line and there were the 2 cowboys. I said to them, "Getting ready for the long drive home?" One answered, " Yeah, we live in White Sulphur Springs."

Do you also run into arguments with your intuition and later wish you had listened.


Yeah, I do, and I am sure that I wrote a comment more lengthy than this post in her comments section. Ha!  Is your intuition telling you that you should click over and read Manzanita's blog? Yep, that's what I thought....

V IS FOR VICTOR GOES THE...

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

The post was actually titled To The Victor Goes The... and it was written by Susan Gourley/Kelley over at Susan Says. Not that you asked, but I had Susan written down in three, maybe four, different letters of this Alphabet Challenge. I kept moving her around in an effort to fit "everyone" in. Turns out with 26 letters there is no fitting "everyone" in.

Susan says this about herself in the ME section of her blog:  "I write fantasy using my real name, Susan Gourley and romance under the pen name, Susan Kelley.  I've been writing for nearly ten years and have three romance series and so far two fantasy series published or being published.  I read as much as I can across many genres including YA, suspense, thrillers and of course fantasy and romance." I will add that she is a retired teacher, posts on a variety of topics that are frequently writing related (though not always), active commenter, and loyal supporter. I consider myself lucky to have found her blog and I hope you feel the same.

Cue the traveling music:




To The Victor Goes The... by Susan Gourley/Kelley
10/30/13

I remember a line in the movie, The Dark Knight, where Batman says you either die a hero or live long enough to become the villain. Or something like that. I've always loved that idea for a novel plot.

In my upcoming release, First Dragon, war is spreading across the land of Morbunda. Long ago in the history of Morbunda, a war was fought that resulted in great loss of human life and the apparent annihilation of all dragons. It took generations for civilization to recover. Now war is coming to Morbunda again, and this time the aggressors are the former heroes of the first war. Just like Batman said would happen!

In most fantasy novels, war is part of the plot line. In the best novels, each side in the war believes they are fighting for what is right and best unless they're purely evil. I hope the readers of First Dragon see the issues driving both sides of the new war.  And I hope lots of people read First Dragon when it's released this Friday from Crescent Moon Press.

Do you agree with Batman? Do you think wars happen in cycles? Have you read any good fantasy novels where you couldn't really tell who the good guys are and who the bad guys are?


Susan consistently asks the thought-provoking questions. She makes me think about my characters in my writing and my life. Thank you Susan!

U IS FOR USING THE EMOTIONAL THESAURUS IN THE CLASSROOM

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Using The Emotional Thesaurus In The Classroom was written by the extremely talented Dianne K. Salerni over at In High Spirits. I found Dianne through the Unicorn Bell blog. She and Marcy Hatch started something called FIRST IMPRESSIONS. This is what she says about it on her blog: "My first 3 posts of each month are devoted to FIRST IMPRESSIONS-- short crits of first pages submitted by YOU! I'm teaming up with Marcy Hatch of Mainewords for this feature." Dianne is one of the many published authors who pays it forward every month by helping out aspiring authors to get their words just right. Dianne is also a teacher (soon to be retired) and all-around lovely person.

Dianne used to have a photo of herself on her blog, but does not any longer. Instead, her profile picture is the main character of her newest book: Jax Aubrey. The book is The Eighth Day.

This is Jax (and not Dianne):

Cue the traveling music:



Using The Emotional Thesaurus In The Classroom by Dianne K. Salerni
6/25/12

Teaching is sometimes like that game where you throw Velcro balls at a Velcro target. Sometimes the ball sticks, and sometimes it doesn’t.  Teaching anything in the last week of the school year is dicey, and so when I decided to bring The Emotion Thesaurus by AngelaAckerman and Becca Puglisi on the fourth-to-the-last day of school and share it with my writing class, I wasn’t expecting much.

However, my fifth grade students thought it was a really neat idea, and they loved hearing me list the physical descriptions that went with certain emotions.  I made the thesaurus accessible and asked them to write a confrontational scene between two characters.  They were to include dialogue and physical description.

Some of the Velcro balls fell to the ground.  One student produced something that made me think he must have been in the bathroom when I gave the instructions.  Others made a half-hearted attempt and wrote a scene that used one description taken from the thesaurus. (This is called humoring the teacher and waiting for the clock to run out.)

But here’s a Velcro ball that not only stuck – it landed dead center in the bull’s eye.  This scene was written by Andy, a fifth grade boy, using The Emotion Thesaurus – and Andy did something pretty rare: He made me feel proud on the fourth-to-the-last day of school.

“Snap!” goes Will’s knuckles.

Man, are my muscles tightening.  Now he looks like he’s going to punch me.  I say, “What did I do to you?”

Will says, “You lied to me about something really important.”

Now I’m sweating like crazy and shaking. He is balling up his hand into a fist, ready to punch me.  Trembling, I say, “What are you going to do to me?”

With strength in his voice, he says, “You don’t want to know what I’m going to do to you.”  I flinch when he cracks his neck.  Now I’m looking for an escape.  Will says, “There is no escape for you.”

Now I’m blinking like a mad man who has just lost. I plead, “Please have mercy on me, Will.”

Will angrily says, “Why did you lie to me?”

I say weakly, “Because if you knew the truth, you would have got yourself killed.”

OMG – right?  Not only did Andy know how to use the thesaurus, he knew how to leave his readers hanging! 

I can’t wait to use The Emotion Thesaurus next year, starting from the beginning of the year when the kids are fresh.  And I’m definitely hanging onto Andy’s scene as an example!

Do you have YOUR copy of The Emotion Thesaurus?

Reading this (again) makes me more than a little sad that Dianne is leaving teaching. We need more Great teachers. The flip side is that she will have more time for her writing and I love reading her books. How do I emote that? I don't know. I need that Emotion Thesaurus!

T IS FOR THINKING THE LIONS

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Thinking The Lions is written by Brianne Pagel or Brianne P.  I am pretty sure he'll answer to either one. I discovered this amazing blog during the Coffee Bloghop that I mentioned on my "M" post for this challenge. I loved loved loved Brianne's writing style and immediately followed. Brianne also runs another blog called lit. He is participating in the A to Z challenge on that blog and will PAY WRITERS FOR THEIR STORIES, which he features there. Check out lit if you are interested in submitting a story.

What else? He makes a mean macaroni pizza and he started blogging back in 2005. Interestingly enough, he wrote a total of 9 blogs from 2005-2007. In 2008 the fun began and Brianne's been a blogging fiend since. He racked up 878 posts just in 2009. I still haven't written 878 posts. Way to go, Brianne!

Cue the traveling music:




To The parents of the kids who played "Duck Duck Goose" with Mr. Bunches tonight (and the kids) (Life With Unicorns) by Brianne Pagel
1/28/14

It probably didn't seem like that big a deal to you.

You both had your sets of kids there, in the McDonald's Playland, and your kids all obviously knew each other and got along together, so when Mr Bunches showed up ready to play, you maybe didn't even notice him and if you did notice him it probably didn't seem all that important to you that this other little kid was suddenly there, playing on the slides and mixing in with all of your kids.

You maybe didn't notice, but I did.  As I sat with Mr F, eating our dinner and watching Mr Bunches watch this group of kids that was playing together and all knew each other, I saw, again, as I have so many times before, that Mr Bunches wanted to be part of the game.

And I expected, as so many times before, that he would not.

He never gets to be part of the game, not really, not like other kids can just join in, because while you don't always pick up on it right away and it's hard to notice on a busy noisy playground, Mr Bunches doesn't quite know how. He's not quite sure how to join in and his comments and his reactions and his mannerisms mark him as different. He calls kids "Kid," or "baby" or "girl," and when we remind him to tell them his name, or ask their name, he (as often as not) says "Tell my name" or something else, and that's only the beginning of how he is different, a difference kids pick up on far faster than adults.

Pick up on, and walk away from, as often as not.

So tonight I figured that he would want to join in the slide game, and that he would not get to, that he would hang out on the fringes of the slide game, as he'd hung out on the fringes of so many games before, tag, chase, guns, baseball, and that eventually he would realize that he was not part of the game, no matter how much he wanted to be, and he would drift away, and I would play with him instead, to cheer him up (a poor substitute, a daddy clambering around with Mr F in tow, to keep Mr F from running away, trying to slide or play tag, but what is to be done? He wants to slide and play tag and nobody else will, as often as not.)

But your kids, those kids, you kids, didn't exclude him.  Instead, you let him into the slide game -- letting him slide into you at the bottom of the slide the way you were doing to each other, and sliding into him, too, making him part of the game.

I don't know what you made of it when his voice rang out above the clamor of the Playland:

"DAD! I'M SLIDING!"

but I know what I made of it: he was happy and he was part of the game and you did that.

That wasn't even the best part.

Then, when all the kids decided to play Duck Duck Goose, one of the girls grabbed Mr Bunches by the arm and put him in the circle, where the other kids had left a space for him.

Left a space for him! Brought him in! And then tagged him and made him the goose and when he didn't catch the boy before he got around the circle, watched and smiled and giggled as Mr Bunches went around the circle:

duck duck duck duck goose

and one of the kids got up and chased him and tagged him, and everyone laughed, even Mr Bunches.

But that wasn't even the best part, either.

The best part came three turns later, when Mr Bunches, who isn't very fast, couldn't avoid getting tagged.  Four times in a row he was the goose, four times in a row he couldn't get around the circle before getting tagged, four times! He wasn't upset, he wasn't sad, but he was a little concerned: He couldn't stop being the goose and he wanted to be in the circle. He wasn't sure what to do. I could tell.

I watched.

And one of the other girls said "Pick me."

I watched.

Mr Bunches picked her.

He said

duck duck duck duck goose

and he took off running in his Mr Bunches way, and the girl stood up and made a show of going after him and reached out her hand and almost almost almost touched him

(she could totally have touched him)

and he got around the circle to where they began and I yelled it too,

"Sit down!"

as three of the other kids said the same thing, and he sat down.

Smiling.

Proud.

Part of the group.

You probably didn't think anything of it, this little boy who was a little strange, maybe, coming into the Playland and jumping into the game with your kids and being helped out.

But I did, and I meant it when, at the end, I said "Tell your kids thanks for playing with him."

We went home, and saw Sweetie, and I said "Tell Mommy what you did," and Mr Bunches, still red-faced and flushed with excitement said:

"I had friends!"

It probably didn't seem like that big a deal to you.

But it was huge for us.

So thanks again.

If you're anything like me, you need a tissue really badly right about now. And you might even be thinking, "Why didn't you warn me that would make me cry?" The long and short answer is that I didn't get a warning when I read it the first time, either. You just don't know what you'll get on this blog. You might be holding your sides from laughing or bawling your eyes out. Anyway, I gotta go. I can't see for all of the tears in my eyes.

S IS FOR STEVEN SYMES, WRITER

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

I discovered Steven Symes, Writer and his wonderful blog during the last A to Z.  Steven is a full-time writer. I don't know what you imagine when someone says that, but I picture someone glued to their computer, guzzling coffee (or maybe whiskey), while the rest of their life crumbles around them. They venture out (in my mind) for trips to the park for people watching, or some other venue loaded with strangers, and then back to the keyboard they go. And they write only what they want and lots of it. Turns out that being a full-time writer is not exactly like that... unless you're a bestseller 10 times over. Then it might be something like that. According to Steven full-time writing is like any other job. You write a lot. About what someone will pay you to write. And you can actually have a spouse and family and make it work - with effort. Who knew???

Cue the traveling music:



I Survived a Catastrophic Hurricane by Steven Symes
11/15/13

My camera was damaged during the storm, but this is from right before.

I started to write this post earlier in the week and then thought better of it. It's too personal, too much to go through, but I can't get it off my mind. With the news of the cyclone that battered the Philippines, the memories of my own brush with death and destruction in Tegucigalpa come flooding back in a wave of nightmares.

I survived a catastrophic hurricane and will never be the same for it.

If you want all of the nitty-gritty statistics and scientific information about Hurricane Mitch, you can read about it on the NCDC website here. I was living in the capital city of Honduras, called Tegucigalpa when one of the worst hurricanes to have ever struck the area made landfall. I've known people who've said, "I was in a Hurricane. We didn't have running water or electricity for a couple of days. It wasn't that bad." I wish that had been my experience, because in the thick of the storm for the first and hopefully last time in my life I had serious doubts that I would live to see the light of day again.

The storm was massive and just sat off the coast of Honduras for days, battering it like a boxer. I've never seen so much rain in my life, and I think few people really know what I mean. I grew up in New Mexico with its crazy flash floods, but this was different. People say sometimes the streets become like rivers, but the streets of Tegucigalpa eventually turned into white water rapids.

The death and destruction was nothing short of catastrophic, which was something my young mind had trouble processing. Early in the storm we were hiking up a mountainside (half the city is on mountainsides) when a house right next to us fell over and began sliding down the mountain. That was frightening to feel the ground give way right next to me. Later I stood on my rooftop and watched home after home in the area give way and slide down the mountainsides. Downtown became a huge lake, with water filling the buildings. I watched on television as the prison that was located by the river was abandoned by the guards as the building filled up with water. The army responded as inmates started to flee the building as well. The army was on the other side of the river and the bridge was washed out, so they couldn't detain the inmates. That's when the snipers set up and just started executing anyone who stuck his head out of the prison, right on live TV.

If only that was the end of the shocking violence, but it wasn't. The storm intensified and the capital started to completely melt down. All but one bridge over the river were washed out. Entire mountainsides began to give way as the soil became completely saturated. And I sat in my house, with very little food and water, watching the destruction  creep closer and closer, wonder when my time to die was coming.

Mountainsides are everywhere in Tegucigalpa.

When the storm moved on, the silence in the city was deafening. It was as if everyone couldn't believe it was over. I walked out into the street and that's when I heard it: the screaming and wailing that lasted for days. People were digging frantically in the mud, trying to find loved ones lost. Others were crying over the corpses in the streets. The river was clogged with the dead. Entire buildings stood with two or three walls left. The following day the sky was littered with air traffic as airplanes and helicopters from all over poured in. I saw flags from countries like Japan, France, the United States, England, South Africa, China and Russia on the planes that circled around, waiting for their turn to land and deliver people and supplies.

With roads disrupted, I was forced to walk across the city off the beaten paths. Once we were forced to cut through a barren area at the base of a mountain. It was called El Chile and was an entire neighborhood buried by one of the mudslides. I knew that I was walking over where hundreds of people had been buried alive in an instant. I've been to Gettysburg, and it felt just as somber.

Martial law was declared and anyone out after dark was shot on sight. Looting was rampant. More people died. I went two weeks without having a drop of water, brushing my teeth with Sprite and Coca-Cola, as if that would help.

Two things I learned from that experiences and the images I can never scrub from my memory: any help you can give to people in such a situation is wonderful, especially if you help the professional organizations like the Red Cross (which really knows what it's doing - I've experienced it firsthand) and also that you need to be prepared in case something like that were to happen where you live. I wasn't ready for a huge hurricane and went days and days with hardly any food. Taking a little bit of time to prepare yourself for the worst, without living under a cloud of fear, goes a long way.


When people live through horror and live to tell about it, I want to read it (not that his blog is one catastrophe after another). However, it is full of stories. Thank you, Steven, for sharing not only this story, but all of them.

R IS FOR RED SHOE'S CHRONICLES

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Red Shoe's Chronicles the days of his life. Be warned: sometime Black Shoes grabs control on that blog and it gets ***crazy*** over there. When that happens, I suggest you visit at your own risk. Now, I don't recall when or how I found Shoes, but I am ever so glad I did. He is funny, charming, and a seriously great guy. I vote him Most Likely To Travel Cross Country To Help A Friend In Need. And that is saying something.

and the shoes...

Cue the traveling music:



Momma Said by Red Shoes
7/12/13

When I was a little pair of ~shoes~, my brother had a 1964 Ford Galaxy 500 just like the one pictured above... only his  was a golden/brown color (of course, I am biased towards the color, red).  A BEAUTIFUL car... the damn thing had a 390 cu. in. engine... and was so fast that the from time to time, the car would have to slow down so its paint job could catch up with it.  That is one of the most amazing vehicles from my younger ~shoes~ memories.  My brother was one those "IT" people, whereas I was always on the fringe of any of the cliques of kids in high school. More often than not, I was excluded instead of being included... but that was ok.

But I could go riding with John in that car, and we would get all kinds of attention.  I always imagined that the girls we would meet were talking to US, when in reality, they were talking to him and his nerdy, goofy brother was just there...

Still, when he would say, "~shoes~... let's go riding...", I was always game and ready to go.  Our journeys would take us all over the place around here.  Maybe it would be a late afternoon run over to Rosedale to go see the Mississippi River... or to Merigold...

From time to time, Mom would tell us about things we shouldn't do, and places we shouldn't go... if for no other reason than our own survival.  I suppose Mom did know best... she certainly wouldn't mislead us about things like that.

One of the places in town that was "off-limits" was 'Bob's Drive In.'

Not Bob's Drive In, but...

... it could have been. It had the long awning much like this one... and you could park underneath if it happened to be raining... but if you wanted to be cool, you would park just out from underneath it... you could be 'seen' better that way.

They had the BESTEST chili-cheese burgers, onion rings and cherry cokes...

AUGH!!!!!!

Sooo... this one Saturday afternoon, my brother finds me and says, "let go for a ride..."

I knew that probably meant we would go to "Bob's," get a couple of those burgers up there, and have a great deal of fun...

The car hop came... took our order... brought us our food... and we were in paradise... and I was sitting on the passenger's side of that cool looking Ford up there...

At some point, my brother started the engine... we weren't finished with our food yet... and I asked, 'where are we going?'

"We are going to back up some so we can watch 

that fight over there..."

That alone shows you what a geek I was... I was so busy eating that I didn't realize that  a fist fight was brewing just a few cars away from us... the kinds of things that Mom wanted us to avoid...

... so we back up a bit... and we have a front row seat... this fellow in blue jeans and a white T-shirt is cussing this guy inside a pick up truck up one side and down the other... waving his arms... yelling... stuff like that.  I couldn't hear what the fellow in the truck was saying, but at some point, the fellow on the outside grabs the door handle... jerks the door open... and reaches in to grab the occupant... and...

POW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

... just that sudden, a little red dot suddenly appeared on this fellow's white T-shirt...

Have you ever been a witness to... or involved in anything like this?  In the movies, they tend to portray some of this stuff in slow-motion... and it was... it was moving so slow... maybe to give that fellow as long to live as it could...

After the sound of the shot, this fellow stumbled back and started a turn to his right... and was facing our vehicle...  and there was a little red dot on the front of his shirt... centered right in the middle of that fellow's chest.

... and I said to my brother...

"John... he's dead..."

I was in the ninth grade at the time... I didn't know shit about shit... but I knew this guy was dead.  He stumbled towards us... fell up against the car next to us... spun and staggered out into the gravel parking lot where he collapsed... and bled out what little Life he had left onto the ground.

The bullet must have severed the aorta... or hit one of the major chambers of the heart...  I didn't know that someone could have that much blood in them...  I didn't know that someone could bleed that much...  horror movies don't have the effect on me that this event did...

The next thing I know is that cars are screaming and rushing out of the parking lot... everyone wanting to get the Hell away from there...  We got home... I ran to my Mother and hugged her so tight and was crying... and she was asking John what had happened to me... when we really both lost as to what we had just witnessed...

I better understood then what Mom had tried to save us from... how she was trying to protect us...

I lost a great deal of innocence that day...

Did that piece punch you in the gut like it did me? After you comment here, I strongly encourage you to link over to the original post and read the comments. There is actually a bit MORE to this story...

Q IS FOR QUATRO DE' MAYO: A FAMILY EVENT

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Quatro De' Mayo: A Family Event, penned by Gossip Girl at ~*~Whatever~*~, sums up fairly accurately why this blog works so well. Gossip Girl writes about what she knows. That means she covers local politics, job woes, family melodrama, fishing, hunting, and other stuff the Hubs likes to do, and even menopause. In other words, pretty much everything is on the table and served up for seconds. Sometimes it's funny and sometimes it's serious, but its always interesting!

Cue the traveling music:





Quatro De' Mayo: A Family Event by Gossip Girl
6/10/13

We used to have a family reunion for years. The last one we had was like six years ago. After everyone was gone I swore to my parents that I knew I was adopted, "You can tell me. I won't get upset." It made sense that I was adopted after that day. I was the only one feeling that everyone attending got on my nerves! I have a relative that I'll call Skut Farkus. It's fitting she looks just like him. Seriously I am not lying. Growing up she even acted like him right down to being the neighborhood bully. She was 45 the last reunion and still acted like Skut Farkus and even today still looks just like him. She was asked to leave the funeral of a family friend and was even escorted out of the funeral home and that was two years ago. Now my cousin Farkus either takes too many meds or not enough, haven't figured out which!  After everyone had left and I was helping my mom clean up I told her that this was the last one that I was coming to as we talked about a few things that had happened that day. That was last one that my mom and dad hosted. My sister got the brainy idea to start it back up this year and that she would play host to this day of disaster. I am hoping there are prizes for those who don't want to be there because six years ago when we had the last one it was a total disaster. I used to think we were the only family that has that one family member who comes to family events just to ruin everything which is why I was trying my best to ditch this one. I tried all of the excuses like... I'm allergic and my doctor told me to stay away from things that cause too much stress, stuff like that, but since my sister was hosting the event I couldn't ditch it! When she asked what I was bringing I told her scorpions. No, I swear I plotted going to the pet store to bring a couple, just in case! I have no clue how she did it, but even though Farkus showed up, it went off with no fights or arrests. I am still amazed it happened like that and that is not the Jack talking either!


You been to any family reunions like this one? Me either. That's why it's fun to read Gossip Girl. She writes about all the juicy stuff!

P IS FOR PASSAGES

I am not participating in any of my regular "features" while the A to Z is going on. However, Battle of the Bands did happen without me. I promise I will be back at it on the 1st of this month. However, I did want to take a moment and give a Shout Out to the other folks still participating. It's a lot of fun and I hope you drop by and vote on your favorites.

Stephen T. McCarthy

Far Away Eyes

Arlee Bird

Just click on their name and it will link you directly to the current Battle of the Bands post.

 My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

...as in Middle Passages written by Liza Carens Salerno. Liza is one of the first readers of this little old blog. It's hard to believe that we've been reading each other since 2010. Where does the time go? I cannot say enough good things about Liza. Reading her blog is often akin to curling up in a comfy blanket. It's warm and inviting and just so darn pleasurable.

While today's offering is one of my personal favorites from Liza's blog, I must confess that she doesn't usually write poetry. I just think this is such a gorgeous bit of writing, filled with love, and it makes me all mushy inside whenever I read it.

Cue the traveling music:



For My Daughter On The Cusp of  Twenty by Liza Carens Salerno
7/1/13
 

I see in you a 2:00 a.m. face.

Amber light in a wing-back chair,

The talcum arc of rounded cheeks,

Coils of love vining an invisible wire.

I had yet to know we all remain infants.

Even as we grey, life casts us

Into washing machine blizzards,
Snapping limbs,

Marathon bombs and such.

How to explain—

In some way, you will always feel

Two, or seven or ten or nineteen.

At eighty-one my father said
He didn’t feel different

Until he looked in the mirror.

Now I understand.
I sit on the contoured cushion
of that aging chair,
while down a narrow hallway,
you sleep folded into yourself 

like a moth turned toward the wall.

Bound now by compound steel,
nothing is the same.
But nothing changes.

I know only that

You remain every age you ever were

On the path toward what you'll be,

Your nineteen as young as fifty-four,

Twenty as old as my ninety-three.

Liza, you regularly touch my soul with the beauty of your writing. Anyone who follows the links in the blog are signing up for a little blessing. Who doesn't need more of those? 

O IS FOR OLD MAN ON THE COUNTRY ROAD

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!

Old Man on the Country Road was written by Rosey at Mail4Rosey. I cannot recall how I met Rosey. I am fairly certain is was through a mutual friend who featured her in some way (Manzanita maybe?). Anyway, Rosey writes on a WIDE variety of topics. Honestly, I never know what I will find at her place. Don't you just love a surprise? I do! Another interesting thing about Rosey is that I have *no idea* what she looks like. She snaps pics of her kids all of the time, but she remains the Invisible Woman.  I checked her About Me tab and there is this picture. She doesn't say that it IS her, but it might be... Maybe she will provide the answer in the comments!

Cue the traveling music:





The Old Man on the Country Road by Rosey
10/21/13

There's an old man who walks along the country road, when I'm doing the early morning school run. I assume because he is carrying a brief case, and dressed in a suit, that he is headed to work. If you know country roads, you realize they are not the safest of places to be walking...there's no sidewalk, the terrain is rough, and cars don't always see you.

I have seen this man walking every single day since school started (just this year), and there have been several times I've wanted to stop and give him a ride. But I do not. Not when the kids are in the car, but truth be told, I probably wouldn't even if I was solo...because you just never know.

When the harsh weather happens in, I hope he's not still out there walking.

Humanity should make me stop. Fear of safety prevents me. I'm mad at myself for not stopping, and I'm sad (maybe that's not the right emotion to express how I feel) that I am too scared to stop.

Do you ever let fear prevent you from helping others, when it wouldn't be hard at all for you to help?


Stop in and say Hi! to Rosey and tell her I sent you. I want to know what happened to that old man....

N IS FOR NANNY 911: WHO NEEDS BABYSITTERS WHEN YOU'VE GOT THE POLICE?

My theme for A to Z this year is a wildly different, but very exciting, HERE'S TO YOU all month long. 26 posts to be precise. The most difficult part was narrowing down the 26. All of you deserve your own post. What you will find here is a post by the featured blogger, with traveling music chosen by me that complements said post, and two links. One will link back to the original post and the other to the main page. This year's A to Z is all about making new friends!


This hilarious post is brought to you courtesy of Brandon and Bryan. These guys write the blog A Beer For The Shower. Never read this blog while drinking anything or it might come out your nose. Just sayin'. I think many of you have known about this blog for a long time, but I am new to the party and am thoroughly enjoying myself. I only wish that they wrote more frequently. On Monday I feel great with my Brandon and Bryan fix, but by Friday I am really dragging. If you aren't getting any fix at all, because you have yet to discover this blog, you are in for a treat. Strap on your seat belt. It's about to get funny in here.

Cue the traveling music:



Nanny 911: Who Needs Babysitters When You've Got The Police? by Brandon and Bryan
6/10/13

This weekend Brandon found out that, on a busy city block with almost ten dogs living on it, his two have been barking too much, because they bark about four times a day when someone walks down the back alley. Well, apparently it was bothering one of his neighbors (the only one on the block without dogs, and the only one without a job who doesn't leave the house all day). But, Brandon didn't hear this news from the "all-growed-up" adult neighbor herself. No, he heard it from the city of Denver, in the form of a citation, followed with a warning that if the problem wasn't addressed, the police would be involved.

Which brings us to today's topic, an important reminder for you all: that the police are here to help you handle the petty disputes that you should be able to talk out yourself, not to help you with assault, robbery, and murder.

After calling his wife, praying the rosary, and summing up his courage, Officer Bryan speeds to Brandon's residence...

Thankfully, none of them are packing heat, except for the dog, which is packing a small red rocket.

Meanwhile, across town...

That's right, because back on Main Street, the police are very busy dealing with some extremely unresolved emotional issues.

Meanwhile, across town, while Officer Bryan pulls out two "good boy" and "good girl" stars...

Back on Main Street...

And Officer Bryan resolves their dispute without any violence or bloodshed. Unfortunately, the chumps across town didn't take matters into their own hands like reasonable adults and this is the aftermath...

So remember, folks. The police are not there to "hold your hand" through a robbery, or an assault, or a murder. They are there to handle your petty neighborly disputes and be your own personal Dr. Phil. And if you're worried about being murdered, then I don't know, buy a gun or a really big katana or something, you big damn baby.

Now if you'll excuse us, it's 3 o'clock in the afternoon and Bryan's neighbor has raised their music to a slightly loud volume, so we have to summon half of the Denver police task force to deal with this.

Cheers and stay classy, folks,
Brandon and Bryan


You can thank me later for pointing you toward this blog. Or right now. In the comments.