Tuesday, April 2, 2013


"I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas; they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the colour of my mind."    ~Emily Bronte

The Breakfast Club was a movie, not a dream.  However, I feel that the above quote most certainly does apply.  I shall never forget sitting in the movie theatre watching that film and seeing all of the illusions I had shatter about how I fit into the drama that was playing out at my own high school. 

The first day of high school I had already undergone a transforming experience with regard to my junior high school bully.  She allowed me to see her fear about this new school environment, and the ground underneath both of our feet shifted.  By being so afraid that she had to ask for MY help, she lost all of her power over me.  We both knew she would never get it back.  I understood everything about bullies after that first day of high school; they no longer had any control over me.

However, cliques and labels still were a mystery to me until The Breakfast Club.  We were all pigeon-holed into a grouping that we could never break free of... until I saw that movie.  And then I realized that, once again, it was the Same Old Story.  That story was a junior high mash-up revisited of The Wizard Of Oz.  The only thing that ever holds you back is the Scary Dude Behind The Curtain. 

Watching The Breakfast Club, I could almost feel the glass breaking and exploding and flying away.  It felt like freedom.  Or maybe it was like being in a dark room and someone turning on the light.  Nothing was any different than it was before except I COULD SEE IT FOR WHAT IT ACTUALLY WAS. 

Yep, all of those labels were still there.  Popular kids, athletes, brains, theatre kids, music kids, losers, whatever.  The thing was I could choose to be a part of those groups without being limited by those groups.  More importantly, no longer was someone being in one of those groups mean that I couldn't talk to them, or they to me.  They weren't any better or worse than I was.  Just different.  My fear of someone in a different group, by virtue of their difference, ended.  My inability to speak to someone because we weren't part of the same social group was over.  If I chose not to speak to you... well, it had nothing to do with what social group you were in.

As someone who has watched that movie many times throughout the years, I have come to take away different messages from it.  When I was a teenager, it really changed all of my ideas about how I saw myself, and everyone else, in that arena called high school.  I came to the conclusion that everyone was afraid and lashing out and if you started meeting people with kindness, that is what you would get back.  

As an adult, I watch that movie and I see a variation on that theme.  All of the characters, adults and kids, are coming from a place of fear.  All of them are afraid of  something and that is what has brought them to that place, that day.  When we act out of fear, we bring ugly things into our lives.  Now, when I have something in my life that I don't want, I find myself standing in the mirror and saying to myself, "What did you do, say, think, that brought this into your life?"  And when I can figure that one out, I can crawl, walk, or drag myself toward a solution.  There is always a door of some kind.  There is always a way out.

The Breakfast Club: A Passion and a Life Lesson.     

image found on photobucket.com 

Did The Breakfast Club change any perceptions that you had about your life when you saw it?  Was there a movie that you saw when you were a teenager that altered the way you saw the world and your place in it?  Do you feel that if you bring kindness you tend to get it?  That most people act badly out of fear?  That if you have something in your life that you don't want it is because you brought it and you have the power to get rid of it?


  1. A place of fear - good point.
    It's nice to know once you get out in the real world, most of those cliques and statuses fall away.

  2. I love The Breakfast Club! That last shot when he's fist pumping the air is classic. :D

  3. One of the things that stands out most to me in this movie is loyalty, friendship and community. More than that, it is a coming of age movie, a movie about transformation. It's a classic, one I've seen multiple times and will probably see again in the future.

  4. I was a new mom when this movie came out. I've seen it but, to be honest, got nothing profound from it. Probably because I just sort of paid attention to it. My girls LOVE this movie though. I'll have to ask them your questions!

  5. The best thing about this movie, for me, is how a bunch of totally different people can come together and start to, sort of, understand each other.

  6. I was one of those "in-between" kids in high school. I wasn't popular. I wasn't unpopular. I wasn't athletic or nerdy or weird. I kind of fit in everywhere, but also fit in nowhere...

    That movie made me realize that we're all looking for the same thing. It's just how we get there that's the difference. It also taught me that high school is a bubble and even though certain aspects of the real world are no different, there DOES come a time when you can run into some of those people and view them as people who survived it with you.

  7. Alex ~ Yes, they do.

    Cassie Mae ~ Indeed, it is. Victory!

    M.J. ~ It is all about the transformation. I totally agree.

    Empty Nester ~ Funny how different films speak to us, no?

    Mark ~ Let the conversation begin. The future starts NOW.

    Gini ~ "We're all looking for the same thing." Another excellent take-away from this movie.

  8. Def a great movie. I still like watching re-runs and although it's been a lot of years since high school, oh yeah I do remember them. Great Choice for B!

  9. John Hughes really was able to nail teenager personalities in his films...


  10. Man, I loved that movie. I watched it over and over again. I can't recall it changing my life, other than annoying others by reciting the lines verbatim. It was different watching it has an adult--as a parent of a teen. It kind of scares me--not that anything in that movie was scary, but the fact that kids grow up so fast, becoming independent. I worry that he won't need me for much longer.

  11. Yeah, I've never actually watched the full movie. I need to do that some day. Good choice for topic today.

  12. That was a great movie and really showed how people make perceptions of others without really knowing them.

    I like your take on this movie and that it had a profound affect on you.

  13. I have such positive feelings about TBC. I was new in my town, and a girl asked me if I wanted to come and watch TBC with her and some friends. That group of people took me in and a number of them are friends to this day. TBC sorta changed my life.

  14. This is one of my all time favorite movies. I just watched it the other day. We had to watch it in psychology class in high school, too.

  15. Girl, you are a good writer! I love how you express yourself!

    I found you doing a random "click and search" during my blog touring homework from the A-Z blogging challenge. I was pleasantly surprised by what I read. I loved that movie, but I never stopped to think about it in the terms you did. I love getting your input.

    I look forward to reading "C." See you tomorrow!

    Waiter, drink please!

  16. Gossip Girl ~ Who can forget high school? There are some parts you *want* to forget. No such luck. hahaha.

    LC ~ You nailed that. He sure was.

    Tomara ~ It was extremely quotable. As for your son... for what it's worth here are my two cents. I don't think parents ever lose their kids. The connection changes, of course. It becomes one of need to one of want. I know it was something of a relief to my mother. After all those years when I was a teenager and didn't think she knew a whole lot, somewhere in my 20s the shift occurred and we became friends. Yes, I was independent. I didn't "need" her in the traditional ways; I wanted her opinion. It was huge, very positive change.

    Dawn ~ It is one of those movies that you will take something different away from it each time you watch it. It all depends on where you are in life *right now.*

    Naila ~ Yes, perceptions were HUGE in this movie. Thank you for pointing that out.

    Tim ~ TBC sorta changed my life.---->>> Man, don't I know it. It sorta changed mine, too. In a very different way. This is one of those movies that if you were a teenager in 1985, you have a story to tell. It changed your life. Thank you for sharing yours!!!

    Megan ~ Mine, too:) Favorite movie, that is.

    Dana ~ Thank you! I hope that tomorrow's post, and the one's following, live up to today's post. Nothing worse than being a One Hit Wonder. Anyway, glad that this one got you to thinking about the movie on another level:)

  17. Yes. Kindness returns kindness.

  18. One of the best movies...EVER. And, didn't everybody feel like each one of those characters at some point in their life? (Or am I just weird?)

  19. The Breakfast Club and really all 3 of the movies that all kind of went along together of this type were so much fun! Saw them all many times. TBC was the first movie I ever watched on a VCR when practically no one had a VCR yet!
    For me school was such a safe zone in so many ways. It was where I went to get away from home. It was a place where most of the time people were easy to please. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't all peaches and cream and I can't say that I fit right in, but it's all relative compared to the fear that haunted me at home.
    It's funny. I think we all have to face our fears and learn to push back. I'm glad you got a big lesson on that in high school. A much more appropriate age to learn these things! Doing it as an adult is so not cool! ;)
    Thanks for bringing these great movies back to mind. They are iconic and fun and worthy of multiple viewings. I can't believe there are actually people who have never seen them!


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