Showing posts with label laugh. Show all posts
Showing posts with label laugh. Show all posts

Monday, August 5, 2013

Joking Around

I spent several minutes puzzling over what to write here today.  I finally decided to re-post a joke that I found on Facebook.  I am going to give you fair warning: this is a political joke.  If you don't care for those, you might want to skip it and come back on Wednesday.  However, if you think you can take it, or actually like that sort of thing, this is hilarious.  I nearly hurt myself from laughing so hard.  So read this with caution.  This joke is seriously funny.  Moving on to the joke...



President Obama walks into a local bank in Chicago to cash a check. He is surrounded by Secret Service agents. As he approaches the cashier he says, "Good morning Ma'am, could you please cash this check for me?"

Cashier:
"It would be my pleasure sir. Could you please show me your ID?"

Obama:
"Truthfully, I did not bring my ID with me as I didn't think there was any need to. I am President Barack Obama, the President of the United States of AMERICA !!!!"

Cashier:
"Yes sir, I know who you are, but with all the regulations and monitoring of the banks because of 9/11, impostors, forgers, money laundering, and bad mortgage underwriting not to mention requirements of the Dodd/Frank legislation, etc., I must insist on seeing ID."

Obama:
“Just ask anyone here at the bank who I am and they will tell you. Everybody knows who I am."

Cashier:
"I am sorry Mr. President but these are the bank rules and I must follow them."

Obama:
"I am urging you, please, to cash this check. I need to buy a gift for Michelle for Valentine’s Day"

Cashier:
"Look Mr. President, here is an example of what we can do. One day, Tiger Woods came into one of our bank branches without ID. To prove he was Tiger Woods he pulled out his putter and made a beautiful shot across the bank into a coffee cup. With that shot we knew him to be Tiger Woods and cashed his check.   Another time, Andre Agassi came into the same place without ID. He pulled out his tennis racquet and made a fabulous shot where as the tennis ball landed in a coffee cup. With that shot we cashed his check.  So, Mr. President, what can you do to prove that it is you, and only you, as the President of the United States?"

Obama:
Obama stands there thinking, and thinking, and finally says, "Honestly, my mind is a total blank...there is nothing that comes to my mind. I can't think of a single thing. I have absolutely no idea what to do and I don’t have a clue.”
 

 Cashier:
"Will that be large or small bills, Mr. President?"




Friday, December 24, 2010

Opening Up My Heart


Merry Christmas Eve friends. I am not embracing my traditional Christmas Eve habits this year. My mother and I usually go out to the mall and watch shoppers from the benches in the "safe zone." It is amusing. There are two kinds of Christmas Eve shoppers: frantic and calm. The frantic ones are clearly on the edge of losing it, and the others may have been there and come back, OR they know that there is no point. This day is just crazy and it is just easier to go with the flow. Expect insanity. Expect rudeness. Expect people to push and shove. You choose to be the one stands still and be the serenity in the midst of the madness. It is a character study in its own way.

This year my mom went with my stepdad. Nothing about the mall is appealing when you have a migraine and the fibro aches and pains are back in full force. Turns out that I was really glad I stayed home because I got a phone call from my hs friend Jennifer. I specify because of all the Jennifers in my life. We have reconnected on the telephone (in addition to email) and had a lovely conversation. I thought about calling her, but decided against. She has kids and I thought she would be WAY too busy on a day like today to get a phone call. Not thirty minutes later, she called me. Too cool. We talked a lot about my Big Idea and some of her stuff. And we reminisced about some old times. It was good to laugh.

Here is my favorite Christmas song (I think) on the serious side. I really like Christmas songs, so this is actually a tough call. Merry Christmas to you and yours. Laugh a lot. Love a lot. And if the mood strikes you, sing for no good reason. Even if there is no music playing. People do it in the movies all the time and it's really cool. Sometimes they start dancing, too. So, sing, dance, laugh, love. Change your clothes 20 times to music and do a montage of some kind. Go for it. And if you do that montage thing, video it, and put it on here, because that would be totally awesome. If I had cooler clothes, I would TOTALLY do that. Love ya peeps. Merry Christmas. And on with the song...




It's love.


image found at www.weheartit.com